Mood: hopeful

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It's almost midday in the 1st of January here in Beijing. 2008 is no more. Welcome 2009.
So what did I learn during 2008?

I learned to bitch more, that's for sure XD; Maybe I'm taking this grudge a little over the top.
I made new friends, and lose some old friends too. I'm slowly learning to accept it. There's no way we can keep anything forever and ever. Naturally, we meet, then we leave. It's always been like that. It'll eventually come to an end.

Am I sad?
Pretty much. But that's why I learn to take it easy. Although I'm still far from it, but I can't have this grudge rotting my brain with every passing seconds. I need to get out of it.
Perhaps I'll still keep a small portion of it, just to make those who messed up with me eat what they've been throwing at me. Because I'm seriously pissed off.

My friend's been telling me it's not good for both me and my health. But I guess it's something that comes with the package. You can't change personality that's been built over the years that easily. It'll need serious 'remodelling'. Or a brainwash. Or an amnesia.

Really, I didn't learn much during the year.

I bitched out at my family too. Locked myself for the whole day cos I didn't want to go to Beijing. I don't know, I was really stressed out with my mom kept saying "Later when you're in Beijing [insert action]". I was stressed out of what to become of me in that place, and due to my impression of Beijing being 'gray and polluted', it only adds up to my rejection of their hopes. They were literally standing on a ticking bomb back then.

But did you know what I did inside my room back then?
I played a game for the whole day to kill the boredom. Maybe the reason why I didn't want to leave my room at all was, 'I'm fed up looking at them.'

Then I realized I never felt so lonely before.

I ended up going to Beijing, cos the ticket can't be canceled.
Perhaps a change to environment is pretty good. Although polluted and annoying with all the spitting custom here. I managed to make new friends here. And developed new relationships to some other people over the net.

I must say that cheered me up a whole lot. Kind of gave me a new reason to pass my days. I was able to wake up thinking "Oh, today I'm going to meet [insert person]!" and skips happily to prepare for the meet. It's something totally different compared to my wake up thought few months earlier that was only "Damn, work again. Them again.".

I'm happy with this development during the year. Yes 2008 been a bitch to me, or maybe I've been a bitch to it and everyone. 2008 was annoying for me, but if that doesn't happen, then probably I won't be able to meet new people and make new friends.

If any of you happen to read this. Thanks guys. You rock.

As for 2009, I hope more good things will happen. I've gotta prepare myself for it and what to come. I'll see if I could kick back what it'll throw at me.

Bring it on.

But for now, I'll go back to sleep. *body aches like hell from the hang out last night*